“Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. . . . Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.” (Colossians 3:19, 21)

The creation of the first couple set the standard for everyone that follows. “And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh . . . . Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh” (Genesis 2:23-24). The Lord Jesus quoted from that passage when He answered the question about divorce, insisting that since they were created from the same body, no one should attempt to separate them during marriage (Mark 10:5-9).

Now, in addition to the created order, we have the model of love demonstrated by the Lord Jesus Christ on behalf of the Church (Ephesians 5:25-27) and instructions on how men should “dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered” (1 Peter 3:7).

The “honor” that men are to grant to their wives includes a conscious effort not to be “bitter” against them. That word, pikraino, describes an attitude of exasperation, even including a tendency to become indignant or irritated.

Furthermore, godly fathers must be careful not to stimulate “strife” (contention, wrangling) among their children. Fathers who engender strife in their home guarantee that the children will become discouraged. The father must control his own “passion” while encouraging strength of character and a drive to excel among his children.

Without a strong commitment and willing obedience to God’s Word by the husband and father, the family will suffer turmoil and may be torn apart. In contrast, God’s standards provide the “rock” that withstands the storm (Matthew 7:24-25). HMM III